she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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