your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
