North Korea, Best Korea!
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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