hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
The uberlube is also flammable
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
