I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
