don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize