All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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