Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize