Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize