Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
