There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize