if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize