you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
