They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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