Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Nicole vs. Life
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
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