at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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