I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Randomize
