I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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