If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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