Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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