Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
