he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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