dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
