Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
