her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
porn star boner night. come get it.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
