I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
