The maid of honor just puked.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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