i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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