Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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