What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
