After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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