If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
her facebook's as public as her vagina
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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