I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
