Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Randomize
