she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
