Don't you send me to vm
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
