elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
