The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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