he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
