So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Enjoy the penises
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
