Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
