whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
