Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
