i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
