So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize