it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
