ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I can feel your judgement through the phone
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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