you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Even the bartender felt bad for me
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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