Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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