i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
