I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
